


#General-Shenanigans

by Fullmetal_Sins



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Chatting & Messaging, F/F, F/M, Gen, Multi, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-01
Updated: 2020-03-25
Packaged: 2020-04-06 02:24:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,986
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19053331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fullmetal_Sins/pseuds/Fullmetal_Sins
Summary: A chat-fic, taking place on a discord server made late in the night by Alphonse Elric. Why not combine Amestris High School's most troublesome students into a giant server? Good Idea, right?Side note! This work was inspired by the work by luftballons99 called "several people are typing", please give it a read!





	1. ah shit, here we go again

**Author's Note:**

> Ed is Fullmetal 2:electric boogaloo
> 
> Al is Nya nya nyasputin
> 
> Winry is Memechanic
> 
> Ling is LingBingBong
> 
> Lanfan is naruYEET
> 
> Mei is KpopPrincess
> 
> Paninya is tired gay theif

**Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#general shenanigans)**

**______________________________________________________________________________**

**Welcome, _fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo_! We’ve been waiting for you**

 

**We’ve been expecting you, _memechanic_.**

 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : Al what the fuck

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : Hey brother!!

 **Memechanic** : Ed what the hell is ur name

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : says the memechanic

 **Memechanic** : …touche

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : Ed!! Cmon this is not why we’re here

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : then why are we here, o brother of mine

 _ **LingBingBong**_ **has joined your party.**

 **LingBingBong** : Why does your name not suprise me ed

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : fuck off dickling

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : >:(

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : Anyways

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : I made this for a reason

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : Junior year is coming up around the corner (go ahead and groan) and we might as well have a gc

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : you right

 **LingBingBong** : We gotta keep all the jokes somewhere

  
 **Hide your bananas,** **_naruYEET_ has arrived**

 

 **Memechanic** : and the memes

 **LingBingBong** : oh its the chat cryptid

 **NaruYEET** : you’re right but okay

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : :DDD I also added Mei but she has to make a discord first

______________________________________________________________________________  
 **Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#general shenanigans)**

 **September 20th 8:05pm**  
______________________________________________________________________________

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : Okay so we may have a situation

**_Maes Hughes_ has joined your party.**

**Maes Hughes** : What is this?

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : YOU DID NOT AHSDJHFDSJKG AL

 **Memechanic** : A L P H O N S E

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : IT WAS AN ACCIDENT I ACCIDENTALLY ADDED HIM TO THE CHAIN I’LL FIX IT

 **NaruYEET** : Al you fucked this up badly

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : Okay I moved him to his own private channel we are safe

______________________________________________________________________________

**Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#sorry mrhughes)**

 

 **Maes Hughes** : What is this, exactly?

 **Nya Nya Nyasputin** : Sorry Mr. Hughes, I made a discord group and I accidentally invited you!

 **Maes Hughes** : That’s alright, Al, I don’t mind :D Im not sure how to leave so would you all mind too terribly if I just stayed here and reminded you about tests or something?

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : Sure thing. I’ve added you to your own channel so you won’t see what we talk about :)

 **Maes Hughes** : Thanks Alphonse! Haha, I like that song by the way : )  
______________________________________________________________________________

**Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#general shenanigans)**

 

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : Im crying oh my god

 **Memechanic** : when are you not

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : Touche

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : but okay to sum up the events of today mr hughes is in the gc but hes isolated and just gonna send us reminders? What a pure dude

 **NaruYEET** : good good

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : alphonse markus elric how fucking could you

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : eD YOU SAID YOUD NEVER USE MY MIDDL ENAME

 

**_Kpop princess_ is here! ITS OVER 9,000!!!**

 

 **Kpop princess** : Hello!

 **Kpop princess** : wait your middle name is markus?

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : holy shit this could not get any funnier

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : fuck hes throwing pillows at me

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : dfajwhuiahguahg

 **Memechanic** : hi mei welcome to the bullshit and n stuff

 **Memechanic** : Good bc Mr. Hughes is hella nice and i don't want him to get the sort of impression from me that he will from this server

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : al no i dont want hughes knowing i say fuck

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : everyone knows you say fuck, ed

 

 **Part for the shores! _tired gay_** **_theif_ is here!**

 

 **Memechanic** : OH SHIT PANNNNN

 **tired gay theif** : lmao what is UP FUCKERS

 **tired gay** **theif** : Al how the fuck did you accidentally add mr. Hughes??

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : idk i emailed him this summer??? He asked how ed and I were doing and how dad was??

 **Memechanic** : Yeah he did the same for me??? Oof

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : Yeah. He once asked me about mom freshman year n Colonel Mustard told him why and and I think he still feels bad so he asks about us

 **Memechanic** : Yeah, he did the same thing for me. I asked to call home (I forgot a presentation for his class) and he let me use his class phone. Gran didn't pick up and he said to try my parents and he felt so bad that he let me bring it the next day lol

 **Tired gay theif** : Oh yeah he let me down some painkillers on a rainy day once and gave me some water. I love him sm

 **Memechanic** : we should do smth for him

 **Fullmetal 2 electric boogaloo** : his only flaw his his friendship with mustafuck

**Watch yourself. _KpopPrincess_ is here.**

**Nya nya nyasputin** : MEIIIII

 **KpopPrincess** : Al!!!

 **LingBingBong** : Oh ho ho the lovebirds are here

 **Fullmetal 2 electric boogaloo** : ling ill put mayonaise in your shampoo I s2g

 **Fullmetal 2 electric boogaloo** : Gross tho bro

 **Memechanic** : Aww let em be

 **LingBingBong** : Dont tell me ur pranks Edward ;)

 **Fullmetal 2 electric boogaloo** : ew go take a cold shower you creepy fuck

______________________________________________________________________________

  **Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#general shenanigans)**

 

 **September 20th 9:23pm**  
______________________________________________________________________________

 **Memechanic** : okay so I may have introduced Mr. Hughes to vines

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booglaoo** : you did WHAT

 **Memechanic** : He keeps referencing the Arkansas vine ed help

 **LingBingBong** : You're on your own, Winry

 **Memechanic** : ling pls

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : I agree with Ling for once. You reap what you sow.

Memechanic: Guess I'm legally required to send him good clean vine compilations

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : Yeah don't corrupt him

 **LingBingBong** : Omg imagine how he'll feel now that vine is dead

 **LingBingBong** : Im gonna tell him vine is dead

 **Memechanic** : liNG NO

 **LingBingBong** : LI N G YES

 **Memechanic** : I'll pee your pants I swear to god

 **LingBingBong** : R u threatening me?

 **Memechanic** : mayhaps

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : uwu ling don't you fucking dare

 **LingBingBong** : awe yow thweatening me? owo

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : Perish you bastard

______________________________________________________________________________

_Direct message @ **LingBingBong**_

**LingBingBong** : HEY

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : owo

 **LingBingBong** : DID YOU HAVE ME KICKED AJSGSKEKDYSKD

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : mayhaps

 **LingBingBong** : I'm gonna fuckin sew a dildo to your forehead while you sleep

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : try me bitch

 **LingBingBong** : I will

______________________________________________________________________________

**Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#general shenanigans)**

 

 **Memechanic** : Did you,,, kick Ling,,,

 **Kpop Princess** : I... regret being here

 **Memechanic** : You get used to it you sweet summer child

 **Kpop Princess** : oh geez

 

 _ **LingBingBong**_ **has entered. Hide your bananas!**

 

 **LingBingBong** : YOU THOUGHT IT WAS OVER BITCHES

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : Ugh

 **Nya** **nya nyasputin** : Who invited you back?

 **naruYEET** : Me of course

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : oh look its the chat cyrptid

 **Tired gay theif** : Okay listen I love the Ling hate but I have some fuckin tea on Mustafuck

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : spill it.

 **Tired gay theif** : Okay ssooo my brother went off to college yeah? Well apparently when he was as CHS he and his friends found a video of him rapping its the most 90's bullshit I've ever seen

 **Tired gay theif** : I'll send the link lmaooo

 **Tired gay theif** : _https://youtu.be/aR69TDkmuiw_

 **Tired gay theif** : HE LOOKS LIKE A FUCKING WANNA BE GANGSTER

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : IM PISSUING

 **Memechanic** : HAHAHA HOLY SHIT

 **LingBingBong** : Im,,,, I Wanna Send It To Him

 **KpopPrincess** : AFHAJKFJGFJASFHJKLSDAKASH

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : I taught Mei what keyboard smashing was ^^

 **Fulmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : augh the hets are at it again

 **Memechanic** : Okay,,, I have an idea

 **Memechanic** : we go into Bradley’s Office

 **Memechanic** : we blast the video, somehow (leaving that to ed)

 **Memechanic** : all over the intercom

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booglao** o: on one hand gold.

 **Fullmetal 2 electric boogaloo** : on the otherhand: painful, agonizing, failure.

 **Memechanic** : dont fucking go road to el dorado on me this is a Good Idea

 **Memechanic** : @NaruYEET okay can you break into the office,,, while no one is looking,,,,, and blast the video

 **NaruYEET** : I can do that, so long as it’s during lunch

 **Memechanic** : okAY bet

 **Memechanic** : okay uuuhhh @LingBingBong can you act as a distraction?

 **LingBingBong** : yeah sure, anything to piss someone off

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : Oh look, ed, we have an ed reincarnate!

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : oh look I’m about to kick your ass, Al

 **Memechanic** : boys, boys, you're both pretty shut up now

______________________________________________________________________________

**Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#sorry mrhughes)**

 

 **Memechanic** : okay how bad would it be if someone did,,, some shenanigans

 **Maes Hughes** : What kind of ‘shenanigans’?

 **Memechanic** : can you be sworn to secrecy

 **Maes Hughes** : If it’s not illegal, or can get you expelled, yes?

 **Memchanic** : okay so hypothetically,,,,, if someone, not us ofc) blasted Mustang’s rapping video over the intercom,,,, How Dead Are We

 **Maes Hughes** : At least detention, of course. I’m not sure for how long.

 **Memechanic** : Thanks Mr. Hughes

 **Maes Hughes** : Happy to help :)


	2. Feelings and Wisdom Teeth (ft. more shenanigans)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ed is Fullmetal 2:electric boogaloo
> 
> Al is Nya nya nyasputin
> 
> Winry is Memechanic
> 
> Ling is LingBingBong
> 
> Lanfan is naruYEET
> 
> Mei is KpopPrincess
> 
> Paninya is tired gay theif

**Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#pwan owo?!)**  
______________________________________________________________________________

 **Memechanic** : we find the city of gold

 **Memechanic** : we take the gold

 **Memechanic** : THEN we go back to Spain

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booglaoo** : And buy Spain!

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : but whats up with the Road to El Dorado lately lol

 **Memechanic** : its iconic thats what

 **Memechanic** : okay fr fr here’s the plan:

 **Memechanic** : Al distracts the staff by saying Ed and Ling are in a fight

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : HEY

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : why do I have to fight >:(

 **Memechanic** : You and Ling are constantly doing something, whether it be physically fighting or arguing or whatever lmao

 **LingBingBong** : I mean, that’s fair

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : ig ig

 **Memechanic** : So while this whole thing is going on, Lan Fan and Pan sneak into the office, and I’ll keep watch

 **Kpop Princess** : What about me?

 **Memechanic** : You, dear child, have the greatest task of all: documenting history, and making sure we aren’t caught! Drive all the staff out of the office, provoke the fight, cheer, and all that shit.

 **Kpop Princess** : Oh, okay!!

 **Memechanic** : Now that we’ve settled all this, I say we start the plan next at lunch, alright?

 **naruYEET** : fine by me, I’ll help in any way I can

 **LingBingBong** : Any excuse to beat up the shorty~

 **Fullmetal 2; electric boogaloo** : BOLD OF YOU TO ASSUME THAT I WON’T KICK YOUR ASS

 **Memechanic** : this is a pissing contest free zone y’all

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : but for the record, I think Ling has a better chance imo

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : BETRAYAL BY MY OWN BLOOD

 **Memechanic** : I swear to g o d

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : i’ll punch god in the face

 **Memechanic** : Oh my I have the perfect image for that

 **Memchanic** : https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/303438421408612354/585657904212869120/i_just_wanna_punch_god_in_the_face.jpg

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : JKFHAKJFHDGKSDAHG DID YOU PHOTOSHOP THAT

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : that’s ed for you -w-

 **Fullmetal 2: slectric boogaloo** : eye

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : I don’t know what I was expecting

 **Memechanic** : uwu

M **emechanic** : random but this reminds me of something _**@Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo**_

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : ?

______________________________________________________________________________

Direct Message **@Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo**

 **Memechanic** : aww fuck I forgot that I have to get my wisdom teeth out :/ I was supposed to get them out over the summer buuuuttt I had stuff to do. can you do me a solid and drive me there and back? I’ll be all dosed up so,,, no drivey

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : why can’t granny?

 **Memechanic** : she’s gonna be out of town and I kinda told her you’d do it

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : UGH winryyyyyyy! Fineee. Only out of the Kindness Of My Heart.

 **Memechanic** : thanks. I owe you one. <3

______________________________________________________________________________

Direct Message **@Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo**

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : Brother, where are you?

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : oh, taking win to get her wisdom teeth out.

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : and you didn’t tell me?

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : nah, I forgot lol

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : >:(

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : shrug emoji

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : oh she’s out

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : oh she’s all loopy oh man this is great

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : SHES TALKIING TO THR FUCKIN CHAIR AHSJDIDH

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : SHE CALLED ME BEDWARD

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : THIS IS WHY I WANTED TO GO!!! :(((

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : oh she’s clingy

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : really clingy

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : oh? :)

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : Ed? It’s been 20 minutes. You okay?

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : h

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : welcome back!

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : help

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : what happened?

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : so uh

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : she said she loved me and got really dizzy so I carried her to the car

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : WHAT

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : what? I'm strong.

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : OH

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : and I said I loved her back

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : WHATS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : she’s passed out in the passenger's side w/ my jacket on her

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : BROTHER!!!

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : WHATTT :(

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : I MEAN WE BEEN KNEW BUT WHAT!!! Y'ALL HAVE BEEN PINING FOR AGES THIS IS PROGRESS

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : WDYM "Y'ALL BEEN KNEW!!"

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : Also, it's not. It could mean a number of things and shes all loopy. It's not right to violate her trust when she's got her guard down. It's not like she'll remember when she gets home

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : She might, Ed. Don't be so down. She asked you to do this because she trusts you

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : She asked because she needed a ride

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : h

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : Nonetheless,,,,

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : Just play it by ear; see how it plays out.

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : Okay, thanks Al. I gotta get going, I'm getting funny looks, hah.

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : Go get 'er!

______________________________________________________________________________

**Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#general shenanigans)**

**LingBingBong** : Where's the bean?

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : I'm right here fucker

 **LingBingBong** : I missed you, honey! :]

 **naruYEET** : ling we’ve been dating since middle school

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : There's the cryptid

 **LingBingBong:** I knowwww but it's fun to mess with Ed. Need any tips with the ladies? Tips with the lads? The nb folks? demi-folk?

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : thanks but I'm saving myself for Troye Sivan

 **LingBingBong:** Damn HEAVEN had me bawling

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** ikr!!

 **naruYEET:** bros what's your favorite album

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** THEY LISTEN TO TROYE SIVAN

 **naruYEET:** yes I do,, answer the question :knife:

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : hmmm idk I like songs from all of them and I own all of them so,,, yes

 **LingBingBong** : coward

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : ADJFHKH what do you MEAN

 **LingBingBong:** :nails: you’re just a coward like that Ed

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : Lanfan please help

 **naruYEET** : :nails:

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : BETRAYAD

 **Fullmetal: 2 electric boogaloo** : oh gotta go

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : I’m taking care of Winry and she’s still loopy from getting her wisdom teeth out and Granny isn’t home yet

 **LingBingBong** : Oh? ;)

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : SHUT

______________________________________________________________________________

Direct Message **@Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo**

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : How’s it going?

 **Fullmetal: 2 electric boogaloo** : Eh, she’s conscious but barely. Loopy from the medicine, they gave her some pretty powerful stuff. Seems to make her sleepy.

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : I meant you, Ed.

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : Oh

 **Fullmetal: 2 electric boogaloo** : Okay so you know the john mulaney special?

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : theres 3 with video and one audio-only,,, which one

 **Fullmetal: 2 electric boogaloo** : damn lemme explain

 **Fullmetal: 2 electric boogaloo** : so that John Mulaney special talking about the dead kid

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : oh god

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : I’ll keep all my emotions right here

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : ed no

 **Fullmetal: 2 electric boogaloo** : and then one day, I’ll die.

 **Fullmetal: 2 electric boogaloo** : that’s my plan

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : every time you do that you take the results of your own actions poorly. You need to take a chance for once. Each time you bottle up your emotions and hold back, you expect things to turn out a little okay, but you can’t do that. It’ll hurt those around you, including the people you care about. You can’t just “do it. Bury the boooyy.” We both know she feels the same way (it’s fairly obvious), but it /is/ a two-sided effort. No one really knows what you’re thinking, and even us who grew up with you, like me and Win, we still kinda have a hard time reading you. Don’t let her just assume on her own, and assume the worse because of your poor actions.

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : You’re gonna regret it later, Ed.

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : https://i.imgur.com/ZHmHih5.png

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : wow way to call me out,,, im just gonna hide behind that meme that hit hard Al. Anyways… I know I shouldn’t, I’m used to it I guess? It’s no excuse, but I want to have a good relationship with her too. I don’t want to mess up what we already have, and I really, really care about her. I don’t want to lose her I guess.

 **Nya nya nyasputin** : I say this bc I want you to actually attempt a relationship with Winry. You two are good for each other, and, as your brother, I have the most authority to say that. Don’t worry so much, and take the chance. It won’t mess up your relationship on the off chance she rejects you. She cares about you too much.

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo** : Thanks, Al. I needed to hear this. I can’t guarantee a change right away but I’ll try.

 **Nya nya nyasoputin:** That’s all that can be asked of you

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** Love you bro

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** Love you too :3

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** Oh, got to go. She’s waking up fully.

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** Ahh. Go get her, tiger!

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** haha, okay :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait! I'm actually still in school and I have stuff to do augh,,, also, I use actual images! I drew the I just wanna punch god in the face one myself, it's on my instagram (@yourlocalartgay) and I post art for the fic there! Sorry for the self promo, and because this is my toughest year so far I'll be busy and updates will be sporadic, But i'll be updating in my free time!!


	3. its gonna be linguini

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ed is Fullmetal 2:electric boogaloo
> 
> Al is Nya nya nyasputin
> 
> Winry is Memechanic
> 
> Ling is LingBingBong
> 
> Lanfan is naruYEET
> 
> May is KpopPrincess
> 
> Paninya is tired gay theif

**Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#general shenanigans)**

  **September 23 9:23 pm**

**______________________________________________________________________________**

  **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** ughhhhh

 **tired gay theif:** oooo what is it 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** nothing you need to fuckin know about >:/

 **KpopPrincess:** Place your bets! Ed’s either got a crush or Ling did something! This is how he always gets! ^^

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** SHUT OYU RUFKING MIOUTH 

 **naruYEET:** i bet crush 

 **KpopPrincess:** ** _@Nya nya nyasputin_** status report!

 **Fullmetal 2:electric boogaloo:** al please I’ll do the laundry for a month 

 **LingBingbong:** and what’s in it for me? 

 **Fullmetal 2:electric boogaloo:** I can't believe I’m saying this but anything you want 

 **LingBingBong:** get a tattoo of my face on your ass 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** Ling,,, I am /begging/ you,,,, anything less permanent

 **LingBingBong:** A temporary tattoo of my face on your forehead that you cant remove for two weeks

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** /deep fucking sigh/ fine 

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** I wasn’t going to say which but the laundry is a nice bonus

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/270281141746008094/609618294034530314/IMG_20190723_145331.jpg

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** well fuck me aren’t I just boo boo the fool 

 **naruYEET:** I think we should still place bets whoever loses has to ask Mustang for how to get a date for prom, winners film

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** glad I’m not participating

 **naruYEET:** You have to be present with the losers and ask him for advice on how to get a date for prom 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** AW WHAT THE HELL

 **Nya Nya Nyasputin:** I’m going crush 

 **LingBingBong:** I’m going crush route 

 **naruYEET:** hmm,,, crush

 **KpopPrincess:** I’m voting Ling ^^ someone’s gotta be different

 **tired gay theif:** ditto

 **tired gay theif:** what’s win voting? Is she not here?

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** lemme @ her but she may be sleeping or loopy on the meds they gave her 

 **Fullmetal 2 electric boogaloo:** **_@memechanic_**

 **Memechanic:** hmmm Ling. also I was almost asleep so thanks for the @ ed 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** thank me later when Al and I bring you some of the stew you asked for that he and I worked on for HOURS. 

 **Memechanic:** AUNT TRISHAS STEW RECIPE WAS GIVEN TO YALL AND YALL WOULD NEVER LET GRANNY MAKE IT FOR SOME REASON AND I DONT GET IT WHATS THE POINT 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** BECAUSE WE WERE MAKING SURE IT WAS PERFECT FOR YOU YOU DOLT

 **tired gay theif:** ED HAS A CRUSH

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boogaloo:** NO I DONT SHES GOT HER WISDOM TEETH OUT AND WE JUST WANNA MAKE SURE THAT NOTHING GOES WRONG, IT WAS ALS IDEA

 **tired gay theif:** I NEVER SAID IT WAS ON WINRY 

 **tired gay theif:** **https://i.imgur.com/eXuwWCQ.jpg**

**Fullmetal 2:** electric booboo the fool: fuck this im gonna listen to copycat and make mom’s stew

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** WHO THE FUCK CHANGED MY NICKNAME

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** ^^;;

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** AUGH THROWING PILLOWS IS NOT VALID

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** we going :plane: trench warfare rn 

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** im hiding 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** COME ON OUT FUCKER AND CHANGE MY NAME BACK 

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** (*´・ｖ・)

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** fine I see how it is 

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** owo?

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** im taking the stew to winry ALONE because my brother and all my friends BETRAYED me and leaving you alone 

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** k bye

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** bitch

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** plenty of brotherly love here folks

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** Oh granny isnt home so it’ll be just you and winry 

 **tired gay theif:** ooooo just ed and his crush, eh? 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** I DONT HAVE A CRUSH ON WINRY, NOR DO I HAVE ONE AT ALL

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** fuck this fuck yall its stew time

  **______________________________________________________________________________**

Ed’s car door slammed when he reached the home of his childhood friend. Before he could take a single step, a familiar bark rang from the porch. Glancing up, he was tackled by Den, of whom he greeted with a groan and the thud of falling in a dirt road. 

“Jesus, Den, a little more warning would be fuckin’ nice,” he muttered. Despite his slight annoyance, he grinned, ruffling her fur before standing. Den, happy to guide him up the dirt path, trotted happily in front of him to lead the way, as if he hadn’t been there since childhood. Before he could even call, the door swung open, and a hand dragged him inside happily. 

“Okay, so before you even start, I just took some drugs for my gaping mouth holes and I’m gonna get hella loopy so say something before I get dizzy and tired,” Winry said quickly, jumbling her words together. 

Ed snickered a little, prompting a playful, light slap on the arm 

“I’m being serious!”

“Alright, alright. Do you want to eat now or later? I figure now is better, considering your whole…” He motioned around her, laughing a little. “Whole situation.”

“Now, if you don’t mind. I haven’t eaten very much, I’ve been sleeping a lot.” 

“Sure, give me a minute, it’s in my truck,” he motioned that he was heading out the door, only for Winry to tease him as he walked out. 

“Oooh, Mr. Country-Bumpkin with the truck! You gonna go muddin in the backroads?” She teased, imitating an exaggerated accent. Ed yelled something back unintelligible, throwing back a crude hand gesture before returning with a covered, sloshing pot of stew. Putting it on the stove, he returned to their conversation. 

“Very funny, Ms. I-live-in-the-middle-of-the-boonies. At least our apartment is near Central,” he shot back, teasing her by lightly punching her on the arm. 

“Shut up, or I’ll purposefully get my mouth blood on you,” she retorted, grinning, then cringing at the pain from smiling. 

“Dumbass, don’t smile if it's gonna hurt you!” Ed sighed, a small smile twinging on his lips while he handed her an ice pack. She muttered a small ‘thanks,’allowing him to prepare their lunch. Small conversations followed suit, eventually leading to discussions of what they’d do, both deciding to marathon all the Ghibli movies they could scrounge up until someone fell asleep, or, until Granny came home. . 

Various yellings at the screen, cries, and rage-induced sighs followed, and, about half way through their third movie, Winry fell asleep on Ed, resulting in a panic from the blond, but finally, a calm he hadn’t felt in years. That was, until his phone buzzed, receiving a text from his brother. 

_Hey Ed, how’s babysitting going?_

**_Don’t call it that.  What are you up to?_ **

_Nothing much, just watching a movie. Its this weird shitpost (basically a shitpost) called The Velocipastor. I kinda fell in love with it._

**_What the fuck, Al_ **

_Shush. It’s really good, we’ll watch it when you get back._

_Soooo… any interesting developments? :)_

**_What does /that/ mean? We’re just watching Nasuicca._ **

_You know what it means, brother :) Any canoodling? Smooching? Perhaps,,,, casmooching?_

**_Casmooching isn’t even a word, Al. And NO, nothing happened. Winry took some medicine and fell asleep, thats all._ **

_On you, I bet_

**_This isn’t a fanfiction or an anime, Al_ **

_Whatever, I bet she is. I have a sixth sense_

**_What, do you fucking see dead people_ **

_Suddenly I do not see_

_Anyways, when are you gonna be home?_

**_Dunno, Granny isn’t home yet._ **

_Mkay. Don’t get too comfortable ;)_

**_Shut UP_ **

**______________________________________________________________________________**

  **Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#general shenanigans)**

  **September 23 11:48 pm**

**______________________________________________________________________________**

**Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** you didn’t change my name huh 

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** nope! 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** ugh guess this is me for the rest of the chat 

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** what’d yall dooo you got home awfully late 

 **tired gay theif:** yeah did you canoodle with my best friend 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** NO 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** we ate stew and TALKED and played video games and played with Den till she fell half way through Nasuicaa and I finished the movie, and proceeded to eat all the popcorn. 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** did you know that if you drink a 12 cup pot of coffee and play Yume Nikki it feels like an acid trip

 **tired gay theif:** I came here for edwin caoodling this is not what I wanted

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** WHY DO WE HAVE A SHIP NAME 

 **tired gay theif:** cause yall have been wanting to canoodle for AGES so go ahead and CANOODLE

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** the gays are at it again

 **LingBingBong:** ed we’re all “the gays” to some degree 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** i been Knew mr. LingBingBong

 **LingBingBong:** you bean knew 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** we are. The same height. The short jokes are old and played out and only worked on me when I was a Young Lad

 **LingBingBong:** they worked up until that growth spurt you got when you al and winry visited up near Drachma and you never went back in to change your automail until it damn near broke

 **LingBingBong:** How did you do that again? 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** i was playing a rhythm game,,, 

**LingBingBong: Which one :3c**

**Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** shut the up

 **Memechanic:** hehehehe 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** what does the fucking memechanic have to say 

 **Memechanic:** so cruel, edward.

 **Memechanic:** I was Going to tell you to get on kast and stream yume nikki with me and _**@Nya nya nyasputin**_ but ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** what’s yume nikki? 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** its a game where you collect items :)

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** sounds fun! 

 **Memechanic:** Yes,,, very fun

**______________________________________________________________________________**

  **Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#general shenanigans)**

  **September 24 2:03 am**

**______________________________________________________________________________**

**Nya nya nyasputin:** so that was not fun

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** I was Tricked >:(

 **Memechanic:** :3c

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** I don’t wanna sleep,, i’m not scared but i’m Unsettled 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** oops

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** well i’m not full of cowardice so im going :plane: sleep 

 **Memechanic:** akdhaf yeah same I just took my medicine so im really sleepy 

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** SO YOU TRICK ME,,, AND LEAVE ME TO SLEEP KNOWING IM UNSETTLED AND WONT SLEEP FOR AN HOUR OR TWO 

 **Memechanic:** snzzzzzzzzzz 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** snoooorreee

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** ;-;

  **______________________________________________________________________________**

**Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#general-shenanigans)**

**September 24 8:09 am**

**______________________________________________________________________________**

**Kpop Princess:** My poor Alphonse :( 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** Backstreet’s back ALRIGHT!

 **Kpop Princess:** oh while I’m at it 

 **it’s gonna be mei:** mwah

 **it’s gonna be mei:** I got tired of my old name. I feel like this one fits the attitude of the chat more. It’s more… meme-y, I suppose? 

 **its gonna be mei:** I still stan loona but,,, my biases must wait for memes

 **Memechanic:** omg mei texting in class? we tainted the younger gens minds

 **its gonna be mei:** we are in the same generation winry lol

Memechanic: youre,,, youre babey,,, must be protected

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** UGHHHH

 **Memechanic:** yes? 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** OOO GOODY TWO SHOES GOT DETENTION

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** Yes!! Because a certain pair of jerks kept me up and I fell asleep in class!!

**Memechanic: ｡：ﾟ(｡ﾉω＼｡)ﾟ･｡**

**Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** hehehehehe

 **Linguini:** A new name appears!

 **Linguini:** Aw Mei beat me to it

 **Linguini:** Lanfan and I watched Ratatouille for the first time together the other night and I have a plan for my nickname hehe 

 **Memechanic:** Aww that’s a good movie 

 **Memechanic:** rat wing man!

 **Memechanic:** omg remember the gay rat wedding in arthur that was so iconic

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** wait how come Mei and Ling can change their names and I can't >:(

 **Linguini:** That's easy! Lanfan is an admin

 **naruYEET:** everyone please,,, stop blowing up my phone in class oml

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** that’s our sign to stop ig 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** lanfan will you change my name :(

 **naruYEET:** no 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** :(

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** Well anyways  ** _@memechanic_** can I dm you? I gotta ask smthn 

 **Memechanic:** sure lol

 **tired gay theif:** what’d i miss

 **tired gay theif:** OMG HE’S GONNA CONFESS

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** I HAVE NO ONE TO CONFESS TO 

 **tired gay theif:** lies 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** ANYWAYS 

  **______________________________________________________________________________**

  ** _Direct Message @Memechanic_**

  **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** Do you remember what we talked about after I took you to the car when you got your wisdom teeth out? 

 **Memechanic:** vaguely, but it's very fuzzy **  
** **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** What do you remember?

 **Memechanic:** I talked to the chair, called you something, but I don’t remember what, and then I think I got really dizzy. I remember bits and pieces to be honest. 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** Ah, okay. Just wondering

 **Memechanic:** Why do you ask? 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric booboo the fool:** No reason

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow, a new chapter (way longer than the previous two) in a week? a miracle! I had a lot of fun writing this, lol. Thanks to my friend Ed for the new Ling name! Also, please let me know if you like the style break! I want to include it more for voice calls and such but I'm not sure if it's wanted. I'm quite rusty when it comes to that sort of thing. EDIT: I hated the non-chatfic part of this and rewrote it. New chapter up tonight!


	4. Alfredo Linguini son of Auguste Gusteau inherente of Gusteau's Restaurant

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all! Please re-read the previous chapter, because I changed a large portion of it, and I'd really appreciate if yall would reread it. I hated a section of it and I rewrote it. More content I guess? Haha

**______________________________________________________________________________**

 

**_Direct Message @tired gay theif_ **

 

 **Memechanic** **_:_ ** **uuggghhhh**

**tired gay theif: what’s up?**

**Memechanic: I fucked up**

**tired gay theif: how**

**Memechanic: Ed asked me if I remembered what I said when I got my wisdom teeth out**

**tired gay theif: BIG yikes but why is that a big deal**

**Memechanic: Oh im sorry have you met me, the resident dumbass?**

**tired gay theif: you right but what did you SAY**

**Memechanic: I told him I loved him when I got them out**

**tired gay theif: WINRY,,, HONEY,,,**

**tired gay theif: It’s about time**

**Memechanic: PANINYA**

**tired gay theif: but! Why are you freaking out?**

**Memechanic: because I told him I didn’t remember what happened**

**tired gay theif: WINRY ROCKBELL**

**Memechanic: I KNOW**

**tired gay theif: what else happened?**

**Memechanic: uhhh well**

**Memechanic: I fell asleep on him**

**tired gay theif: all my shitty romcom knowledge comes into use: he totally likes you if he let you do that, you know how ed is!!**

**Memechanic: or, just a thought, ed ISN'T an asshole and I’m just a friend to him**

**tired gay theif: do you even hear yourself**

**Memechanic: shut**

**tired gay theif: ed totally has a thing for you**

**Memechanic: thats my cue to go to sleep I have no time for this bullshittery**

**tired gay theif: wdym it’s like 9am**

**Memechanic: i cannot see**

**______________________________________________________________________________**

**Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#general-shenanigans)**

**September 24 11:21 am**

**______________________________________________________________________________**

 

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** please everyone tell Ed to stop 

**Memechanic:** stop, ed

 **Fullmetal 2 electric boo boo the fool:** YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT IT IS

 **Memechanic:** Okay, what is it? 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** i bought a metric fuck ton of those tiny babies and I’m gonna get the whole class in on a prank of hiding them in Mustang’s room 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** and add more each day until he notices

 **Memechanic:** What the fuck Ed

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** stop him!!

 **Memechanic:** If you do this I’ll spoil the end of Cowboy Beebop

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** BETRAYAL 

 **Alfredo Linguini:** wait forget Ed’s dumbass plan he’s never finished cowboy beebop???

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** LISTEN,,,,,

 **Alfredo Linguini:** pathetic

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** Don’t call me pathetic you literally drank perfume at that one party because John Mulaney did it and then threw up

 **Alfredo Linguini:** IT WAS ONE TIME

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** IT WAS ONE TIME TOO MANY 

 **Alfredo Linguini:** says the one who fell down the stairs texting and his leg got disconnected so you crawled on the ground like snake just yelling that “my dummy thicc ass keeps alerting the guards” 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** You’re just jealous of my comedic genius

 **Memechanic:** how did i forget about that,,, im gonna lose it im trying so hard not to laugh granny is asleep

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** suffer

 **Alfredo Linguini:** why was I born with all of the dummy and NONE OF THE THICC THATS NOT FAIR 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** suffer ig

 **naruYEET:** I happen to remember a certain someone getting drunk at Rose’s party and drunk cry-singing to Suburbia by Troye Sivan, very poorly I might add, and then throwing up in her fishbowl. 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** i know im dumb of ass okay no need to bring that up

 **Memechanic:** KJASFHKAGHA LMAO

 **tired gay theif:** ed really out here being resident dumbass huh

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** comedic genius, I must reiterate

 **Memechanic:** poor fish all ed eats is like. Hot pockets and and bang

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** HEY i also eat chicken nuggets

 **Memechanic:** god thats so fuckin cursed 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** hold on, mustafuck is on my ass 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** ughhhh

 **Memechanic:** whats up?

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** guess whos joining al in detention 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** i swear he has a vendetta against me

 **Memechanic:** can we get an F in the chat

 **Alfredo Linguini:** F

 **naruYEET:** F

 **tired gay theif:** F

 **Its gonna be Mei:** F

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** F

**______________________________________________________________________________**

**Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#general-shenanigans)**

**September 24 1: 57 pm**

**______________________________________________________________________________**

**Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** ALPHONSE 

**Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: @NYA NYA NYASPUTIN**

**Nya nya nyasputin:** What??

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** check your dms

**______________________________________________________________________________**

**_Direct Message @Nya Nya Nyasputin_ **

 

**Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: so uhhhhh**

**Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: I asked winry if she remembered anything**

**Nya nya nyasputin: woah!!! What’d she say?**

**Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: she didn’t remember anything**

**Nya nya nyasputin: oh**

**Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: Im a dumbass**

**Nya nya nyasputin: Im sorry, Ed. Do you wanna talk about it?**

**Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: nah**

**Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: I just feel kinda dumb for getting my hopes up and just kinda. Melancholic ig lmao**

**Nya nya nyasputin: are you gonna put on your sad boy hours playlist? You did this when you and ling broke up and then got together with Lanfan in like. 9th grade**

**Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: no**

**Nya nya nyasputin: I can see you playing talk me down on your discord spotify extension**

**Nya nya nyasputin: ughhh Ed at least respond so I can give you advice**

**Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: alrighty**

**Nya nya nyasputin: You don’t need to give up, yet. She hasn’t rejected you, nor do you even know if she has feelings for you or not. Have a little faith in yourself, brother. Winry cares about you deeply no matter what, whether she turns you down or not, and that's what matters.  Feelings may or may not fade, but what matters is that you both are mature people who can move on and remain friends. Also, this is Winry we’re talking about. She doesn’t do things for no reason. She asked** **_you_ ** **to take care of her yesterday, not anyone else. She could have easily asked Paninya or me. I’m not saying to read too much into that, but just be a little more aware. You’re really oblivious, Ed. So, stop moping! It will get you nowhere and just make you feel worse. Take the initiative. If you really like Winry, do something about it! The brother I know wouldn’t mope around like this.**

**Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: As usual, you’re right, Al. Thanks for the advice, and I really needed it. I’ll test the waters and ask her to see a movie, just the two if us. I mean,,, drunk thoughts are sober truths yeah?**

**Nya nya nyasputin: I mean,,,, not exactly but whatever has you motivated!**

**Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: okay okay nice**

**______________________________________________________________________________**

**Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#pwan-owo?!)**

**September 24 2:29pm**

**______________________________________________________________________________**

**Fullmetal 2:** electric boo boo the fool: officially adding the tiny babies plan to our pranks

 **Memechanic:** do not 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** rude

 **Memechanic:** everyone told you not to do it

 **Memechanic:** remember when you did something everyone told you not to do then had detention for a week

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** I do not regret drawing a dick on mustangs car its what he deserves

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** ironically he drives a bright cherry red mustang and its so flashy and douchebaggy

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** So uhhhh not to change the subject from eds dumb plan but Mr. Hughes likes its always sunny in philadelphia 

**Nya nya nyasputin:** I’m buying him a life size danny devito cut out

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** can everyone chip in like. 230 cenz its like… 7900 cenz

 **Memechanic:** yes ofc its what he deserves

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** my plan is NOT dumb yall just don’t recognize comedy 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** but yes I will help you out i love mr hughes

 **Alfredo Linguini:** Yeah, and Lanfan already agreed

 **tired gay theif:** I am so down for that 

 **Its gonna be Mei:** Ooo? Yeah I'm down 

**Nya nya nyasputin:** yell heah

**______________________________________________________________________________**

**Roof Mustafuck can eat my ass (#pwan-owo?!)**

**September 24 3:30pm**

**______________________________________________________________________________**

**Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** uuuuUUUUGGHHHH

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** Why’d you get detention in the first place?

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** I was on my phone in class and tiny dick mustafuck said “get off your phone fullmetal or you’ll never graduate”, so I flipped him off and said “I’m literally a straight A student but go off old man” so he gave me detention

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** that… makes sense for you

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** jokes on him I don’t need his fucking grade anyways, the pathetic man teaches biology. Who the fuck CARES

 **Alfredo Linguini:** how?? You don’t do shit in the classes 

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** I know the material already so I fuck around and pass the tests. not hard

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** god i HATE that he calls me fullmetal. I have a steel leg and suddenly its all fair game to make fun of the crippled kid

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** I think its more endearing than poking fun

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** whatever

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** anyways, detention time

 **Nya nya nyasputin:** yeah,,, ^^;;

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: @Memechanic** can you check your DMs before I go? I need to ask you something

 **Tired gay theif:** oooo eds gonna ask out his crush

 **Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool:** I do NOT have a crush shut your fuckin mouth 

 **Memechanic:** hm? Sure

**______________________________________________________________________________**

 

**_Direct Message @Memechanic_ **

 

**_Memechanic: what’s up?_ **

**_Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: so you mentioned that your favorite movie is Spirited Away, yeah? It’s being played at the movie theatre by my apartment_ **

**_Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: Do you want to go see it?_ **

**_Memechanic: Sure! I can’t believe you remembered that, I mentioned that a while ago._ **

**_Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: Well, it's my favorite, too._ **

**_Memechanic: Is Al going with us?_ **

**_Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: Nah, I thought it could be just the two of us. I don’t think he's that big of a fan of Spirited Away_ **

**_Fullmetal 2: electric boo boo the fool: Is that okay with you?_ **

**_Memechanic: Yeah :)_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! I'm so sorry for the slow updates (8 months,,,) but I have good news! I plan to have a new update out in the next week or so because due to the quarantine I have nothing to do. I have a lot of AP classes that have been kicking my ass, so that's a sort of explanation as to why I've been Hohenheim as of. I hope you enjoyed the update!


End file.
